Barbecue Tattoos

BBQs are the absolute greatest invention of all time. OK, maybe grilling food over a fire and eating it outside isn’t exactly an invention, but you get what we’re saying here. The only thing better than hanging out with friends at a backyard BBQ is being trusted to man the grill. As you stand in front of the hot coals flipping various meats (and the occasional ear of corn/asparagus) and cooking them to perfection, you basically hold the fate of the entire event in your hands. People will kowtow to your every need in an attempt to curry your favor so they can get their hands on the first of the burgers to come off. Others will huddle around you, offering their opinions but still knowing that you are in charge. Being the grill master is a great responsibility, but goddamn does it feel good. 

We’re guessing that a fair number of the tattoos in the following gallery belong to people who fancy themselves to be BBQ Barons themselves, showing their devotion to their craft in their choice of ink. So pull up a lawn chair, crack open a cold one and let Hank Hill start us off. 

The Grill

You can’t have a BBQ without a grill. This is the most necessary ingredient. I have been invited to “BBQs” where the host pulls out some potato salad and a shitty party-sized sub. I’ve never left a place faster in my life. That shit is unacceptable. You need a grill. Period. 

Burgers

The burger is the staple of the backyard BBQ. It doesn’t matter if it’s a fresh patty made with a carefully portioned mixture of chuck and sirloin or a frozen patty from Costco, a backyard BBQ burger is going to hit the fucking spot. You get those char lines on the patty and *Chef’s kiss!

Pork

Whenever I think about eating pork I can’t help but think of the words of the greatest mind of my generation—Homer Simpson.

It can be ribs or pork chops or pulled pork or bacon wrapped asparagus…. but there better be some pork on the menu.  

Hot Dogs

“There are no two finer words in the English language than ‘encased meats,’ my friend.” – Hot Doug

Editor’s Note: If you come to my BBQ and put ketchup on a hot dog, like the specimen above, you will be immediately removed from the premises. Violently. 

Steak and Brisket

I can’t even think about brisket without starting to salivate. Which means I drooled a little on my keyboard as I put together this gallery. I probably shouldn’t have told you that, but, well, too late to go back now. Steak on the grill is a little fancy for my tastes, but goddamn is it delicious. 

Adult Beverages

There is no greater joy on Earth than standing in front of a grill, staring at the flames, and enjoying a cheap domestic beer. It’s a heavenly feeling. 

Well, I’m stepping out of the office early today to go home and fire up the grill, even if it is only 60 degrees out. BBQ season is here!